hi ladies

Hi molly, Ni rae, Hi Ate'!!!!
Iknow I havent been very good at calling the past six months but I wanted to say hello and that Im always thinking about you guys. I sure miss you guys and of course I ache for the valley. But wanted to say i havent forgotten you all and I will try to be better about dropping you all a line. FYI: you all should try posting It would be good to keep in touch and airtime saved.LOL
Im such a nerd - guess whos the First United Methodist Preschool Parent-Teacher Co-op President for 2008-2009 school yr????? You guessed it. Hope I can stay focused with it. Let me know how all you ladies are doing. Please!!!!!!!!

Do you finish projects and tasks you set out to do?!?

The first bag of shredded paper that was thrown out. I put the soda can there so you can size up my past. HA HA no pun intended. yuk yuk!

My shredding work station. I do a little every day when I can and get back to it when Rhy lets me. See that bin - it was overflowing with paper a week ago. That bag there is bag no. 2. See that curain panel behind the paper mess - thats another craft that needs to be completed. I sewed that curtain and hung it two yrs ago and still havent hemmed it. There are straight pins holding the panel up. UGH! I know. See im real good at beginning a project but Im not a finisher. I never finish a thing. I need to work on that. Two resolutions for the 2008 yr: complete past projects that I started BEFORE starting new ones, and take better care of myself. P.S. I'm almost finished painting Rhys room - started that project back in March 2007. hahahaha Oh! by the way the other two laundry baskets have paper that needs shredding too. Im trying to organize my paper shredding piles. Anal I know. Help! I sorted into small papers (anything smaller than 8.5x11) and large paper (larger than 8.5x11). Hazel once said Im borderline OCD! Do you agree?

The clutter of craft things in my bedroom that needs to be sorted, discarded and reorganized back into the office. FYI: because I rearranged in the office to much of my hubbies dismay - I have to spackle the walls and repaint all the old holes - THEN time to make new holes :0) Cheer up DC there only walls. (j/k) See that bookcase in the back - I started sanding that back in 2005. Still not finished - task got too hard, so I cleaned it off and brought it back inside. I used a foam liner to cover the half stripped paint job. hahahah

Thanks to you

cant wait to put all my stuff back in the office and start sewing. Almost too frightened to put it all back and am deciding if I should sell or donate some of the craft things left over from my 'wedding planning' days. If I tell people I know - they'll tAKE it but theres always that "just put it away for me" - i'll pick it up later. Uh No! I want it out of my space now. Not stashed away in the garage or in a closet. Away now. Oh ..... the clarity that comes with no clutter. You all should try. It took me 20 yrs to come to terms and finally i feel free. By the way if you havent already noticed - my favorite Tv show right now is Style networks Clean House with Neecee Nash. Im a organizing neat freak. ITs a disease. Sometimes not a good thing for my family. FYI: as a kid I would scream and chase my dad out of the house for the DAY so I could clean house without disturbance. Weird I know. I have always been a weirdo. :0)

Just a pix I thru in of "Thank You" cookie Treat Bag's I made for Rhy's teachers. Yes I made it. I was so proud. I've had crafting block for months and this was thrown together in 30 minutes (even the cookies baked again store bought dough).

First of all I wanted to say thanks for listening. I updated Rhyans post earlier and then posted my news and walked away from the computer. *pause* Standing in the Laundry room I realized how much better I felt after venting. I was feeling really lonely because DC has been distant lately. So having no one to listen to me or talk to I was feeling really yuk. Then I decided to post and now I feel like someones listening. Thanks guys for checking in. give me feedback so I know someones reading. Hello? *echoes*

Pictures of my unfunctional craft room/office. And the new craft table that DC built for me over the past five days. Now I can breathe in the room. I couldnt figure why he spent so much on something Ihad nothing to do with. I didnt ask for it - he just made it. Surprise Surprise! I asked why - was told just because he wanted to. honestly I think hes tired of our evening routine and wanted to do something to get away from me. Im too much work for him. News to report - soon DC will have his ears surgically reattached because apparently I talked his ears off!

He's even admitted that when family comes to visit - he disappears because my family and friends give him a chance to himself while they keep ME preocuppied. Well - why I...? If thats the case - fine - He can stay lonely in the garage for the entire marriage. LOL. I need a mail shoot installed for his meal trays to fit through the laundry room door. You hear that all. Come visit me - cuz im real lonely. Maybe its time to get a job. Wait I have Rhy I cant! So enjoy the pictures.

I'd like to think I got the desk as a reward for reducing my clutter in the garage and in the house. When I say Im a pack rat thats no joke. I finally threw away 18 yrs of excess baggage. No joke. I've kept years and years of paper work. A heriditary curse - receipt collecting. I keep all my college work notes, lecture books (that were relevant), medical receipts, letters, every birthday card or congrats card I ever received. No joke. You think Im exaggerating - Nope. I kept it all. If you know me well enough you know that this is true.

So on with the details, I emptied 15 rubbermaid bins (the medium sized ones) of clutter, donated piles and pounds of textbooks, romance novels, clothes and books and books and more clothes - you name it. I am STILL shredding an entire bin full of receipts, bank statements, school related papers (drop/add forms, enrollment verification) etc etc etc. The poor paper shredding machine I purchased keeps over heating and has to wait 15 minutes before it powers on again. This is why its taking so long. Also because the waste basket that attaches is sooooo small it has to be dumped every few sheets of paper. ARGH! Did you know I even have bank statements and junk mail and IMPORTANT mail unopened from as far back as 2001. No joke. So I have to end the procrastination and open every single one and shred whats not important anymore. LOL I even found a letter about bills and bank statements I didnt know I had. I went delinquent on one of school loans - funny story 0 NOW! I was two yrs behind and didnt even know it. My dad said didnt you get a payment booklet - how could you have missed that. They make it easy for you Rhonda. So I swore up and down and sidways that I never received a payment book. If I had I wouldve known that my forbearance was over and it was TIME TO PAY! BUt nothing. This was five yrs ago we went through this fiasco. Then last month I after my umteenth bundle of unopened mail that had been packed away in a bin and stored in closet after closet - I opened an envelope that contained one sallie mae payment book. Then three days later I opened another envelope dated one yr later with a duplicate payment book from sallie mae. HUH! wouldnt you know I did get one. *ROTFL* Now its funny but then - oh heck no. My father was furious. And I was so elated. Doh!

Life ..... sure tires you out!

HI people Life really sucks right now. Really need some encouragement right now. I am so stressed and confused. So many things are getting to me and Im trying not to cope with it by binging on food. So anyway having a very hard time breaking 170 lbs. I finally broke it last weds and on monday I weighed myself, 168.8lbs. Yeah! right. Well hardly! I keep getting myself down about not weighing 140 already. My ultimate goal is to weigh 135 but Im losing track of foresight. I keep seeing mothers around town that have children Rhyan's age and have already given birth to another OR are pregnant as I type. So its really fustrating for me right now. Im getting down on myself saying shoulda coulda and why didnt I...... ARGH!!!!!!
So am I jealous of these women, uh... YES! Am I mad at myself for not losing the weight from Rhyans pregnancy , uh .....heck yea! If I had only lost the weight right after I gave birth I wouldn't be in my current situation. But then I think about it. I had much to deal with in the beginning. Met a guy - got pregnant - which wasnt planned. Had to change life in a matter of months. Everything I had planned and worked on went up in smoke. Of course until Rhy was born *grin grin*! But no matter all this only works if the other party is a willing participant. And lets just say that my now spouse wasnt so thrilled about the rush of mother nature.
You know reading my pregnancy journal and the margin notes I remembered plenty of what went on. Had repressed these memories - hmm wonder why? But from month 2 until month 8 I was sad and crying and lonely and unsure what my relationship with DC held. I had the support from my parents and my step dad and from the one person who didnt have to BUT DID! My very best friend in the entire universe, Ate (HH, R.N.). To her I am infinitely grateful for everything she has done for me and she did it because she loved me. Now thats true friendship if not family! Have I been there for her as much as she for me....maybe not. But I try to make it up with what little I can. Working on being a better friend. Promise!
I honestly thought that I would raise this kid alone, finish school and live in Tempe forever. But something changed and my lil boyish partner (at the time) pulled through and whallah! Hear I am. Happily Married and loving life in smalltown NM. Mu hubby works too much and I work - zilch - nada. Wait! Being a mom counts, right? Well it sure does. Its a lot of work and worry to be a parent. Something I could never have imagined as a single person. Lifes in general is tiresome. Thats as much as I can say Im tired. Im tired. Im tired and Im tired. But like someone once said, "Lifes tiresome but I can rest when Im dead". *Sigh*

So on a happier note - anyone else have anything energetic to share????